29/08

Today, feel so blue.....
i know this is the only place i can express my feelings,
because no one will know......

recently, i found out that some of the girls i know split into two different gangs,
how does it happened?
i know partially of it, not all of it.......
but the important things was, WHY????
now i am so lost, it seems like my friends are so fake,
i am giving out my heart, sincerely toward them,
but seems get negative feedback.....

someone told me that ShE is one of the A Gang, which some said were the problematic one,
but for me, i don't think so,
i just keep on thinking the positive side on both......
but one's personalities will tell what he or she is,
i scare...... really fear that ShE will change to another person.....

if ShE really change to another person, honestly, i will feels a small portion of disappointed,
but a BIG portion of sadness......
but the facts keep on telling me, that is true....she might had changed
or this was the true of her.....

i was in dilemma, the holiday which are coming soon,
which way should i go,
i hope that we can have an outing with both the gang once,
but what will happen,
maybe both side will feels unhappy,
how if i go one side??? then which side should i go????
the side where ShE was one of it???? or the side where those guys are in????

hard to choose...... because i am afraid of the reality,
i keep on repel myself from the reality.......
but it was so obvious....... i just keep on telling myself.....
ShE is not that kind of person......

someone help me....... now i feels like a knife stabbed in my heart,
can someone pull it out??????

Please God........

start on 14/8

it was saturday...... boring but worried because exam getting near.....
really can't stand it...... i decided to find her.....
something unexpected happened,
we chat until late 12.30..... so worry she will tired the next day.....
we give each other a nickname...... G PO and G GONG......hahaha,
it was the first time, so syok, wait for her reply all the time
SO HIGH......
the next day, she even wake me up for tuition,
but herself fall asleep, late for tuition, haha
really SOH G PO........
that day onward, she wake me up on morning for tuition......
Don't know start from when onward, i start to study......
could it be because of her????

I don't know.....
but i know something,
that the feel might subside one day.... because it not belongs to me,
no one know how much i hope it was true......
that she is my G PO all the time.......
it was just a joke...... the best dream i ever had for 17 years old.......

I LOVE YOU.........